I’d been thinking about voids a lot lately. Not just a space where something is missing or gone but an endless vortex of darkness.
It’s the first week of May in Northwest Arkansas which means that it’s time for the Bentonville Film Festival. Yes, this once small town which grew to be full of corporate imports of all kinds is now sharing that space with MOAR corporate people and some film industry types. It’s very weird, to say the least.
I felt like such a dumbass for going to the E.R. only to need TWO stitches. But better safe than sorry, I figured. Plus, I had insurance so it wouldn’t be great but it wouldn’t break the bank.
I was in 7th grade and wearing a new Pearl Jam t-shirt (even though all I knew of Pearl Jam at the time was what I’d heard on MTV). It had a little girl with paper and crayons on the front and on the back it said “9 out of 10 kids prefer crayons to guns.” Super edgy and smart, right?
My celebrating usually stemmed from other things; people being a little nicer to each other, decorations and bright lights that made it fun to walk down the street at night. I’d be remiss if I didn’t throw out that old demon, consumerism, but not because of gift getting (although I am a material girl in a material world).
Movies and music are pretty powerful in that they can evoke memories. Sometimes it’s a lot like a magic spell. They take you traveling to the past, your past. And sometimes it’s a good past with warm memories and loving thoughts. Sometimes it’s a dark past with unpleasant events. But the good thing is you can control it by either turning off the tv or the radio. Sometimes I like to go to those dark places, either because I feel like being sad (I know sometimes you just need to mope though) or just to have a good cry. Crying can be incredibly cathartic.